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As we have been unpacking Paul’s letter to Timothy we have noticed a clear calling to both men and women in God’s church, in God’s family.  We have distinct roles as men and women in the church and we have distinct roles as men and women in marriage.  This is why gender and sex, male and female, is so important, this is also why modern culture is trying to erase the differences between men and women. 


The mother’s role is sacred, it is special, it is God designed, God given.  The father’s role is also sacred, it is special, it is God designed, God given.  God designed men and women in a particular way for one reason—to give Him glory, to create children, to raise families, to populate the earth with His people, His kingdom, His glory. 

 

“But he who enters by the door is a shepherd of the sheep. To him the doorkeeper opens, and the sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he brings all his own out, he goes ahead of them, and the sheep follow him because they know his voice…I am the door; if anyone enters through Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture.  The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.”

--John 10:3-4, 9-10

 

“Gird Your sword on Your thigh, O Mighty One, In Your splendor and Your majesty!  And in Your majesty ride on victoriously, For the cause of truth and meekness and righteousness; Let Your right hand teach You awesome things.  Your arrows are sharp; The peoples fall under You; Your arrows are in the heart of the King’s enemies.  Your throne, O God, is forever and ever…In place of your fathers will be your sons; You shall set them up as princes in all the earth.  I will cause Your name to be remembered from generation to every generation; Therefore the peoples will give You thanks forever and ever.”

--Psalm 45:3-6

 

“Jesus answered, ‘My kingdom is not of this world. If My kingdom were of this world, then My servants would be fighting so that I would not be delivered over to the Jews; but as it is, My kingdom is not from here.’  Therefore Pilate said to Him, ‘So You are a king?’ Jesus answered, ‘You yourself said I am a king. For this I have been born, and for this I have come into the world, to bear witness to the truth. Everyone who is of the truth hears My voice.’ Pilate said to Him, ‘What is truth?’”

--John 18:33-38

 

  1. God is raising up men, fathers, elders, to lead His church, to lead their families. Men you are the King’s Men.

 

 “It is a trustworthy saying: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a good work.  An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, sensible, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but considerate, peaceable, free from the love of money; leading his own household well, having his children in submission with all dignity  (but if a man does not know how to lead his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?),”

--1 Timothy 3:1-5

 

Men are called to lead—we should want to lead, we should want to become God’s men but it is a great responsibility.  We don’t just become God’s men without growth, without hardship, without suffering.  Men in the modern world want the title of leader without doing the important work as a true, godly leader. Our modern culture, modern evangelicalism coddles men instead of raising men up to God’s standard.   If a man wants to be a leader in God’s church he must be willing to work hard and to be faithful especially when nobody but God is watching.

 

 

 

“What is the use of a lazy minister? He is no good either to the world, to the Church, or to himself. He is a dishonor to the noblest profession that can be bestowed upon the sons of men.”

--Charles Spurgeon

 

“Above Reproach.”

ἀνεπίληπτος anepílēptos, from G1 (as a negative particle) and a derivative of G1949; not arrested, i.e. (by implication) inculpable:—blameless, unrebukeable.

 

“Deacons likewise must be dignified, not double-tongued, not indulging in much wine, not fond of dishonest gain, but holding to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience.  And these men must also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons if they are beyond reproach.”

--1 Timothy 3:8-10

 

“Double-Tongued”

δίλογος dílogos, G1364 and G3056; equivocal, i.e. telling a different story:—double-tongued. double tongued, double in speech, saying one thing with one person another with another (with the intent to deceive)

 

“Now it was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.’ Again, you have heard that the ancients were told, ‘You shall not make false vows, but shall fulfill your vows to the Lord.’ But I say to you, make no oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is the footstool of His feet, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King.  Nor shall you make an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black.  But let your statement be, ‘Yes, yes’ or ‘No, no’; anything beyond these is of the evil one.”

--Matthew 5:31-37

 

Men must be men of their word.  Full of integrity, honesty and trustworthiness.  If one is to preach Christ they must also live for Christ, following Christ’s will, Christ’s commands.

 

“Now He who prepared us for this very purpose is God, who gave to us the Spirit as a pledge.  Therefore, being always of good courage, and knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord— for we walk by faith, not by sight—we are of good courage and prefer rather to be absent from the body and to be at home with the Lord.  Therefore we also have as our ambition, whether at home or absent, to be pleasing to Him… So then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as God is pleading through us. We beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.  He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”

--2 Corinthians 5:5-9, 20-21

 

  1. Men, we are to have an excellent and trustworthy character. We are ambassadors for Christ!

 

“Temperate, sensible, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but considerate, peaceable, free from the love of money.  (but if a man does not know how to lead his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?), and not a new convert, so that he will not become conceited and fall into the condemnation of the devil.”

--1 Timothy 3:2-3

 

“Deacons must be husbands of only one wife, leading their children and their own households well.  For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a high standing and great boldness in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.”

--1 Timothy 3:12-13

 

 

 

Temperate: The idea is of someone who is not given to extremes. They are reliable and trustworthy, and you don’t have to worry about wide swings of vision, mood, or action.

Sober-minded: This describes the person who is able to think clearly and with clarity. They are not constantly joking but know how to deal with serious subjects in a serious way.

Of good behavior: The idea is “orderly.” It is the same word translated modest in 1 Timothy 2:9. “Orderly, perhaps dignified in the best sense of the term” –John White

Hospitable: They are willing and able to open up their home to both friends and strangers.  Fond of guests.  Generous to guests.

Able to teach: This means they are skilled enough in the Bible to teach, either in a public or one-on-one setting.

Not covetous: This is a more encompassing thought than merely greedy for money. The covetous man is never satisfied with anything, always demanding something more or different. A man who is constantly dissatisfied is not fit for leadership among God’s people.

Who rules his own house well: The godly leader demonstrates his leadership ability first in his own home; Paul recognized that it is in the home where our Christianity is first demonstrated.

 

“The wise of heart will receive commandments, But an ignorant fool of loose lips will be ruined.  He who walks in integrity walks securely, But he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.  The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, But the mouth of the wicked covers up violence. Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers all transgressions…He is on the path of life who keeps discipline, But he who forsakes reproof makes himself wander about.

--Proverbs 10:8-10, 11-12

 

The Christian life is a life of moderation, of temperate behaviour (not indulgent) and a life of discipline.  There is a created order to humanity and there is an order in God’s house of worship and the homes of Christ followers. God commands order in His church, in His people, and we must strive for order in our personal lives, in our homes.

 

“Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ.  Now I praise you because you remember me in everything and hold firmly to the traditions, just as I delivered them to you.  But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ.”

--1 Corinthians 11:2-3

 

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children, and walk in love, just as Christ also loved us and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma… For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.  This mystery is great, but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.  Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.”

--Ephesians 5:1-2, 31-33

 

  1. Your greatest legacy is a life imitating Christ, a legacy pouring eternal power into your families—so deny yourself and worship Christ.

 

“I am writing these things to you, hoping to come to you soon, but in case I am delayed, I write so that you will know how one ought to conduct himself in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and support of the truth.”

--1 Timothy 3:14-15

 

The truth of the Christian faith is simple:  We are saved because God has loved us.  God lived a perfect life, died a horrific death, and raised himself back to life so that you may live in Him!  So that He may live through you and so that your sin could be put to death—do not indulge in your sin, rather indulge in God’s word, God’s Holy work, in the Holy Spirit, in the Life of Christ.  Give yourself to Christ—when you do this you will find it easier to become generous, to lay your life down for each other, for your spouse, for your children—this will build into an eternal legacy. 

 

“This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you.  Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.  You are My friends if you do what I command you.  No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you.  You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would abide, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you.  This I command you, that you love one another.”

--John 15:12-17

 

“Now many crowds were going along with Him, and He turned and said to them, ‘If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple.  Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple… So then, none of you can be My disciple who does not give up all his own possessions.   ‘Therefore, salt is good, but if even salt has become tasteless, with what will it be seasoned?   It is useless either for the soil or for the manure pile; it is thrown out. He who has ears to hear, let him hear.’”

--Luke 14:25-27, 33-35

 

“Then Jesus said to His disciples, ‘If anyone wishes to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me.  For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.  For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?’”

--Matthew 16:24-26

 

We can’t be Christ-like if we aren’t with Christ. 

 

“If the world has our heart, should we think that heaven is our home?”

--Paul Washer

 

“So great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him.  As far as the east is from the west,

So far has He removed our transgressions from us.  As a father has compassion on his children,

So Yahweh has compassion on those who fear Him.  For He Himself knows our form;

He remembers that we are but dust.”

--Psalm 103:11-14

 

Jesus is calling His people.  He is building His church.  Paul is reminding Timothy of that as Timothy is leading the church in Ephesus.  Fathers, are your leading your families?  Would Christ be okay with what happens in your personal life, in your homes—what would your wives say about leadership?  The greatest thing that God has given us is our salvation, the second greatest gift is allowing us to be Fathers, we have our families, our children, our wives—God has blessed us.